I absolutely love going to Career Days. Elementary, middle, high school- it doesn’t even matter. As a successful professional, especially one who is a male of color, I feel I have an obligation to speak to young people and tell them about my journey. To see the students eyes light up when I tell them I am a lawyer literally melts my heart. I share with them the work that I do with my degree, how I aim to help everyone I encounter, and how much I value and love my work. I enjoy answering the questions about how much money a lawyer makes, why the work is so interesting and how awesome it is to be an entrepreneur. Then, without fail, a student always asks what does it take to become a lawyer. That’s when things get real.
I break down the torturous three years of law school required to obtain a law degree. I explain the difficult transition from college life to law school life. I explain how law school students are required to take seminars, classes covering all types of legal areas, and have to complete readings from textbooks that are several inches thick. Then I jump into the dreaded bar exam. The two-day, 14-hour long exam that covers over 25 legal topics being tested through 250 multiple choice questions and eight essays. At this point a look of sheer fear, disgust and apathy is on most students faces. That is when I impart the real lesson in my presentation.
The idea of becoming a lawyer or doctor or any other highly respected and admired profession is incredible appealing and coveted. This is no different that becoming a professional athlete or an entrepreneur. However, the shine quickly loses its luster the second someone becomes aware of the amount of hard work, sacrifice and dedication required and demanded in order to achieve these positions and this level of success. The reason behind this is that people fall in love with the rewards associated with hard work and choose to disregard or accept the most critical aspect- the hard work it takes to ear those rewards.
It is easy to understand how and why this happens. We love rewards. We love the finished product. We love the amazing feeling that comes with successfully completing a task or project or achieving a goal or dream. This same love is not shared when thinking about the work involved in getting to that point- the preparation, the planning, the sacrifice. So how do we address this? We make ourselves love the process just as much if not more than the reward. By loving the process we are placing ourselves in a position where we are ready, willing and able to do whatever is necessary to get to our goal. By loving the process we are prepared to deal with the obstacles and failures that guaranteed on the road to success. We approach the necessary work with the same level of energy and enthusiasm that we will once we achieve our goal. We know the process is not appealing but we have to curb that feeling in our minds so that we can do whatever it takes to get through it.
As a student I remember hating the idea of doing any type of public speaking. I didn’t like to raise my hand in class or participate in group discussion for fear of embarrassment or shyness. I remember a guidance counselor in high school telling me how I would not become a lawyer because I didn’t like to speak. Knowing that I had no choice but to overcome this obstacle, I began to accept the idea that I needed to love public speaking. I needed to love standing in front of a group to present an idea or a project. I needed to love those opportunities other than run away from them. I was confident that by embracing the process of working on my weakness I would ultimately make it a strength and make the path to becoming a lawyer that much more attainable.
In an effort to maintain a positive attitude during the process, while also maintaining the endurance and perseverance needed to achieve the reward, I find that the most effective way is to set mini-goals which are accompanied by mini-rewards. If you were tasked with climbing a mountain, and the reward you sought was at the top of the mountain, I imagine the feelings of fear and anxiety at the bottom of the mountain would create doubt and in some would cause them to quit. Rather than wait until you get to the top of the mountain to achieve the ultimate reward, set smaller goals along the path to reach the ultimate goal. As you reach these mini-goals you applaud and reward yourself then get back to the grind. Practicing this approach will constantly keep you focused and determined during the difficult process. To be effective at this approach, you must be able to identify the overall goal as well as break it down to multiple mini-goals. It is also clear to establish what the mini-rewards will be as well as a timeframe to keep you on track.
If the process to achieving a goal makes you nervous, anxious or fearful, then you are on the right path. Embrace the process and learn to love it. It is through that process that you will become stronger. It is through that process that you will grow a greater appreciation for the reward or goals. It is through that process that you will prepare yourself to receive that reward!